Traditionally this is the time of year when one stops to reflect on the events of the past twelve months. I've never cared much for tradition, but I am feeling the need to spill my guts about some things that happened this year.
First of all, I think I need to come clean about when I haven't been very active in the blogosphere lately. At some point during the summer, I came down with a serious condition known in the medical field as “procrastinitis.” It usually manifests itself whenever the afflicted party attempts to do something productive, though symptoms may vary from patient to patient. In my case, whenever I ty to do homework, compose a new post for Passing Shots, or to attend to other pressing matters, I feel an overpowering desire to play FreeCell. Unfortunately I am still suffering from the condition, but specialists are working tirelessly to try to find a cure, and I hope to be fit to blog about the Australian Open.
But really, I am far more troubled by something else. Upon reviewing a post I wrote one year ago (entitled "2007: Year of the Boar or Year of the Bore"), I came across these lines:
"maybe there was just something a little too predictable about 2007...flipping through my mental catalogue of this season’s matches, I’m not recalling any one great match."
And suddenly I realized why all the bizarre things in the 2008 tennis season came about. I asked for unpredictability and I got it. First, Federer came down with mono and Djokovic sneaked away with the Australian Open, beating Jo-Wilfriend Tsonga, of all people, in the final. Then Nadal stole Federer's favorite title and his ranking in the summer. The Williams sisters won grand slam titles during an even numbered year (the first time since 2002). Gilles Freaking Simon pushed his way into the year-end top 8. Federer won exactly zero Masters events. And oh yeah, let's not forget Justine Henin up and retired just before Roland Garros. And that's only a few of the surprises 2008 had in store for me. Touché tennis gods, I wouldn't have predicted any of this.
And as for wanting more great matches, my wish was granted again. The first week of the Australian Open had more exciting matches than all of 2007. And that was fantastic. But the most memorable match of the year (and some say the most memorable ever) happened at Wimbledon...and I'd rather forget the result.
So my theory is that 2008 was just a big case of "be careful what you wish for," and that everything that happened is my fault. In an effort to avoid another disaster like 2008, I am going to make a very specific wish list of 2009:
10 Very Specific Wishes for 2009:
1. Roger Federer will be involved in a dramatic five set match in a final of a grand slam (preferably the French Open) against one of his young nemeses (preferably Nadal) and he will win after saving two match points.
2. Justine Henin will suddenly decide that reading the newspaper and taking hip-hop dance lessons just aren't enough to keep her busy. She will not only make a successful comeback at the French Open this year, but she will inspire a generation of young Belgians to play tennis. In ten years, the WTA tour will be dominated by 5'5" players with one-handed backhands and French accents.
3. Richard Gasquet will fight his way to the final of Wimbledon, where he will lose a close match to a 5-time champion. Despite this loss, the experience will have a profound effect on Gasquet and he will become a model of mental toughness on tour.
4. Maria Sharapova will give up tennis and decide to pursue a career as an actress in television commercials. (I have a feeling this one could come back to bite me--I do watch quite a bit of TV, and I don't fancy being interrupted by her every 10-15 minutes).
5. David Nalbandian won't wait until October to start his campaign to make it to the Masters Cup.
6. Kei Nishikori will emerge as the next best young player after making the semis of the Australian Open.
7. The Tennis Channel will greatly increase the amount of live tennis it shows throughout the year, and greatly decrease the number of episodes of Destination Tennis and Murphy's Guide it shows.
8. Marat Safin, Ivan Ljubicic, and Marcos Baghdatis will make it back into the top 20. Amelie Mauresmo will get back into the top 10. (That's like four wishes squeezed into one).
9. Mary Carillo, inspired by her Olympic experience, will decide to concentrate exclusively on human interest stories in the world of rhythmic gymnastics. She'll take Dick Enberg with her.
10. And of course, I can't forget Andy Roddick. May his road to a second Grand Slam victory be paved with plenty of Gilles Mullers and Janko Tipsarevics.
Happy New Year everyone. May all of your wishes come true as well...so long as they do not contradict the above list and/or are not otherwise in conflict with my well-being and happiness.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Breaking News: Roddick's New Game Plan Revealed
I know it has been over three months since I last posted, and I have a perfectly good explanation for that, the details of which I will reveal in a later blog entry. For now, I only have time to break this surprising news:
Andy Roddick has found a new coach for the 2009 season: Larry Stefanki. You may remember, Larry Stefanki was widely credited for Fernando Gonzalez’s run to the Australian Open final in 2007. Unfortunately, not long after the Australian Open, Gonzalez was at home in Chile when he came upon a dog who was the victim of a hit-and-run. Being the big-hearted teddy bear of a man that he is, Gonzo attempted to rescue the animal. But unbeknownst to him, the dog carried a strain of an extremely rare virus that causes the loss of any knowledge gained over the past six months. Consequently when he tried to play tennis again, he was the same old mindless ball bashing Gonzo that we had grown accustomed to over the years. Stefanki tried to help his pupil return to form, but it proved futile, and eventually they parted ways.
But it seems that Gonzalez’s loss is Roddick’s gain, as he has snatched Stefanki up in hopes that Stefanki can work the same miracles on him that he did on Gonzalez.
Roddick and Stefanki have both stated that they are very excited about working together. Personally, I was initially skeptical about this partnership, mostly because I think that Roddick is beyond help. But new information about their plans to retool Roddick’s game have made me reconsider: specifically, a photograph of one of their first practice sessions that has leaked onto the internet.
(At first I did not recognize the subject of the photo, but upon closer inspection I realized that it is in fact good old Andy Roddick. I think he was difficult to recognize because his hairline seems to have receded quite a lot since I last posted on this blog.)
Behold the new secret weapon:
Yes, under the advice of his esteemed coach, Roddick has decided to exchange his racquet for a frying pan. Also, due to the nature of his new equipment, Roddick has had to switch to a one-handed backhand.
“I told Andy, ‘Listen, your old Babolat Pure Drive basically played like a frying pan,’” said Stefanki. “It was big and clunky, and he got no feel with it anyway, so I told him to give the frying pan a try. This new stick is a little more head heavy than he’s used to, but I think it will add some power to his shots.”
Roddick feels hopeful that the changes he’s making to his game will propel him back into the top 5.
“Larry has been great. I’ll admit I wasn’t sure the frying pan was a good idea, but Larry sold me on it. And he totally reassured me that switching to a one-handed backhand wouldn’t be a big deal since my two-handed backhand kind of sucks already anyway. I really think I’ve got a good shot at the majors again thanks to Larry.”
Roddick will get his first chance to test his new game out at an exhibition tournament in Abu Dhabi at the beginning of 2009. The tournament will also feature Roger Federer, Rafael Nadal, Andy Murray, Nikolay Davydenko, and James Blake.
Andy Roddick has found a new coach for the 2009 season: Larry Stefanki. You may remember, Larry Stefanki was widely credited for Fernando Gonzalez’s run to the Australian Open final in 2007. Unfortunately, not long after the Australian Open, Gonzalez was at home in Chile when he came upon a dog who was the victim of a hit-and-run. Being the big-hearted teddy bear of a man that he is, Gonzo attempted to rescue the animal. But unbeknownst to him, the dog carried a strain of an extremely rare virus that causes the loss of any knowledge gained over the past six months. Consequently when he tried to play tennis again, he was the same old mindless ball bashing Gonzo that we had grown accustomed to over the years. Stefanki tried to help his pupil return to form, but it proved futile, and eventually they parted ways.
But it seems that Gonzalez’s loss is Roddick’s gain, as he has snatched Stefanki up in hopes that Stefanki can work the same miracles on him that he did on Gonzalez.
Roddick and Stefanki have both stated that they are very excited about working together. Personally, I was initially skeptical about this partnership, mostly because I think that Roddick is beyond help. But new information about their plans to retool Roddick’s game have made me reconsider: specifically, a photograph of one of their first practice sessions that has leaked onto the internet.
(At first I did not recognize the subject of the photo, but upon closer inspection I realized that it is in fact good old Andy Roddick. I think he was difficult to recognize because his hairline seems to have receded quite a lot since I last posted on this blog.)
Behold the new secret weapon:
Yes, under the advice of his esteemed coach, Roddick has decided to exchange his racquet for a frying pan. Also, due to the nature of his new equipment, Roddick has had to switch to a one-handed backhand.
“I told Andy, ‘Listen, your old Babolat Pure Drive basically played like a frying pan,’” said Stefanki. “It was big and clunky, and he got no feel with it anyway, so I told him to give the frying pan a try. This new stick is a little more head heavy than he’s used to, but I think it will add some power to his shots.”
Roddick feels hopeful that the changes he’s making to his game will propel him back into the top 5.
“Larry has been great. I’ll admit I wasn’t sure the frying pan was a good idea, but Larry sold me on it. And he totally reassured me that switching to a one-handed backhand wouldn’t be a big deal since my two-handed backhand kind of sucks already anyway. I really think I’ve got a good shot at the majors again thanks to Larry.”
Roddick will get his first chance to test his new game out at an exhibition tournament in Abu Dhabi at the beginning of 2009. The tournament will also feature Roger Federer, Rafael Nadal, Andy Murray, Nikolay Davydenko, and James Blake.
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